Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Rounding on Myself

I am ashamed of some of the things I thought of myself the other day. My weight shouldn't change who I am. I'm a confident person. Or at least I was. Did you know that when you realize how heavy you are that your confidence can literally shoot right out the door?
I have always prided myself on eye contact. On the comfort I have in meeting and talking to new people. But yesterday I couldn't hardly look somebody in the eye because I felt like they were judging me.


How rediculous is that!

I've always believed that plus sized people who have a lot of confidence are sexy. They don't let their weight stand in their way. And people don't see them as overweight, they view them as fun, sexy, confident people!

So I'm over my problem. At least for now. I have my revelation photos tacked up. But now when I look at them I'm no longer revolted or ashamed. I put up a photo of myself only 3 years ago when I was 75lbs lighter. Now I have a goal.

They are just photos. This is my life.

I am a strong woman. I have battled cattle and horses for half of my life. I may be overweight, but I'm also strong as an ox. I have a lot going for me right now. I have a good, steady job. I have a beautiful little home. I have a tightly knit, loving family and easy going, fun loving friends. I have animals who trust and love me. I'm a part of some fabulous groups who accepted me as I was.

The only person judging me is me. And what I think of myself isn't what other people think of me. I need to give everybody else a little more credit.

Last night I watched The Biggest Loser contestants all run 13 miles. Half a marathon. Half of a freakin marathon! You wanna talk about inspiration? That was it. If they can do it, why can't I?

~Love Em~

2 comments:

Page C said...

I love watching Biggest Loser for the inspiration also. Those contestants are amaazing!

FatGirl said...

I know it! Those are real life people losing real, live weight. Its doable, I just gotta do it!
Em